Just five days left for court and I kept saying to myself I would not buy anything else till Chrissie's adoption is final Friday Morning. It will be exactly 1:00 AM Pacific time and our documents will be in the hands of a judge for her final decision. These documents hold our family's llittle girl faith whether she remains in an orphanage in Bulgaria. We will be the first family in Louisiana to adopt a child from Bulgaria. So this particular judge has reviewed our documents again and again. Many additional documents had to be added and updated. A majority of the funds in our adoption was on document preparation and having to redo document after document. There were days we ran to notarize a document to have it there within days so we could secure her and keep her from being transferred into an institutional setting. I cannot say in words what I have seen in an institutional setting. The pain in the faces of the many lost souls. If I could only tell this judge that our little Chrissie does not deseve this life nor should any child.
If I could tell this judge from my heart she is in my heart as it beats. Each day I wake and wonder what she is doing through out her day. There are days I see other little girls holding the hand of their mother and think one day Chrissie will be holding my hand as today she is holding my heart.
It is very difficult to continue to arrange and rearrange the many items we have placed in her room. The middle of her bed you can barely see the pattern on the blanket due to all of the dolls. I never noticed that there were so many dolls, clothes and shoes till today. Sorting through each outfit I vision in my mind just what she would look like and just which dress to put her in first.
I wonder how she will react as she sees me again. Will she be excited or wonder why it had taken so long for us to get her. What if something should happen in court? I worry about this also, what if our adoption fails. I daily ask God to please ease my mind. I turn my fears to him and I try and not worry. But I do again and again..
At the beginning of our adoption we had first chosen Marya. My heart broke when our adoption for Marya not continue due to her medical was more severe that what we were told. I still in my mind cry out thinking if I could have only been able to adopt her. But knowing our family could not handle all of her needs and also commit to Chrissie. It was on May 10th we committed to Chrissie our "Little Cookie". My sister Teresa we called her Cookie as a child. I remember my brother calling her Cookie because he could not say her name. Chrissie's given name is Kristiana add we decided to add to her name. So we decide Sarah as her first name after a dear sweet friend of mine. Sarah such a beautiful person. I met Sarah when we were first deciding to adopt. Together we both adoptin 2000 in Odessa Ukraine. We both share the journey of adoption together. Her and her husband Gary brought home their daughter Emma and our family Makayla.
When I had fod out Sarah had left to join the angels in heaven I knew Sarah life should be living on in our daughter's name. Sarah would be so proud to know a little one is being named after her.
Sarah-Christiana Micheala Davis our little girl. Oh I am crying, please God I ask that we are officially her parents. I pray these next 5 days go quickly..
Lilypie Waiting to Adopt tickers
